Then there is the occasional boat name that comes along for shock value. Something unsophisticated yet completely relatable deep down. Sometimes satisfying to lips while simultaneously scandalous to the ears. They tried to dress it up with romanticized words but its meaning is quite clear. "La Ratta Bastarda." Yes, The Rat Bastard docked next to us a few days ago and resembled every bit of its name. We stood dumbfounded on deck as it backed into the slip. We had every intention of stealthily sneaking up for a picture after lunch. However, when we next popped our head above deck the boat was gone. Apparently it came in for a quick wash behind the ears and was off reeking havoc on polite society's sensibilities.
Today the new kid on the block is Calpurnia with a crew of three, Mark, Amy and Three year old Robert. At first I wasn't too sure of our neighbors. They kept to themselves all right, but one of the crew turned out to be a real exhibitionist. I don't know if his britches kept falling down or he just like to wear them that low, but it was a little embarrassing when he would bend over, showing a view that would make most people shudder. It's just not every day you see a guy walk around on deck in hat, shades and pull ups!Later he wandered over to us as we were sitting on deck. I was willing to give him another chance and overlook his wanton disregard for modesty. We kept the conversation light and discussed such things as the weather. He was quoted as saying "The rain is good because it washes off all our poop
(bird)." How sweet, such a charming child. Then we digressed to the aesthetics of life. Robert admired the round portholes of our boat and I said I liked his boats square widows. He proceeded to informed me that, "They're rectangular, NOT square." Then he noticed our light box up in the rigging for the running lights, so Byron turned the lights on for him. A red light came on. Byron asked him what side of the boat the red light was on, and he said "The port side." Byron then said what color is the light on the other side, and he said "Green." What's that side called? Robert said "Starboard." He had me fooled, but now a suspicion was starting to creep in. The clincher was when he prefaced a sentence with "I didn't realize . . . and "It make me crazy . . ." and then I knew! I knew that Stewie from the TV show "Family Guy" was docked in the slip next to mine!His dad (hearing the conversation from his own boat across the dock) says that he is going for his captains license here shortly.
That kid is scary smart!
1 comment:
Yeah, when kids start off with "Actually,..." like mine did at two, you know that the conversational skills are there! My daughter Kaleigh hardly played with her classmates when she was three, she spend all of recess, with the teacher, who later said, "you know, she is quite the conversationalist!" Yeah, I know, I know, I hear her conversation 24-7! Cole is two years younger and preferred to just hang out and play with his trains...cool beans.
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